Threads can name the mechanism. But it will not change what, in a moment of closeness, shame, or fear of loss, once again feels like the only possible reality. If you opened this page because you recognized yourself a little too clearly, you do not have to explain everything from the beginning.
You can bring exactly the thought that brought you here — even if it is the kind you would usually delete before anyone sees it.
The old pattern does not return because you “failed to learn the lesson.” At some point it helped preserve a bond, preserve yourself, or maintain psychic equilibrium. That is why one accurate thought is usually not enough to make it unnecessary.
As long as the bond is not over, there remains a chance that the other person’s choice will one day justify your pain. Sometimes what we are holding on to is not the person, but the possibility of a different ending.
Then the other person’s reaction becomes not information about the relationship, but an answer to the question of whether you are lovable at all.
Unavailability sustains tension and desire. Safety can suddenly bring boredom, irritation, shame, or the urge to disappear.
Because insight exists in the mind, while the pattern also lives in the body, affect, and relationships. Sometimes what is needed is not another answer, but a different experience with another person.
The tests are currently in Russian. Answers are processed locally in the browser. You can keep the result to yourself — or bring it to a first session.
A central part of my practice is work with severe personality disorders and severe personality pathology. I work with borderline, narcissistic, histrionic, dependent, paranoid, schizoid, schizotypal, and antisocial personality disorders — including severe cases at a borderline level of personality organization. I also work with higher-functioning patients with psychotic personality organization when their condition is appropriate for outpatient online psychotherapy.
You may already have a diagnosis, or you may have none at all. I work with the person and their structure, not with the label in the chart.
Vindictiveness, dependency, sexuality, envy, the desire for power, and the need to feel exceptional can be explored without romanticizing what is destructive or turning shame into a treatment method.
I am less interested in “how terrible this is” than in why the psyche needed it, what it protects, and why it appears precisely where another person becomes especially important.
We investigate the transition itself between love and hate, idealization and contempt — and who you become beside each version of the other person.
ISTFP · official certification pathway in progressWe create space between event, experience, and certainty about the other person’s motives — so that one guess no longer instantly becomes a fact.
Anna Freud Centre · training / certification pathway in progressPost-Winnicottian, Bionian, and post-Bionian work: a good-enough environment, containment, play, and the analytic field — so that experience can become something that can be felt and thought.
object relations and transference are important lenses, but not the only centerInstead of testimonials about someone else’s therapy, I offer a frame you can actually verify: education, international training, continuous learning, supervision, personal therapy, and confidentiality.
Official certification pathway — in progress.
Official training / certification pathway — in progress.
So that difficult clinical work is not left alone with my blind spots.
Specialized university programs, training with leading psychoanalysts, and educational programs from the APA and EARPP.
Messages, quotes from sessions, and recognizable stories do not become content for reach and engagement.
60 minutes · Zoom · no obligation to continue.
60 minutes.
5 sessions — 10% off · 9,000 ₽ / session
10 sessions — 20% off · 8,000 ₽ / session
90 minutes.
5 sessions — 10% off · 13,500 ₽ / session
10 sessions — 20% off · 12,000 ₽ / session
per session with monthly payment.
3-month package — 30% off · equivalent to 3,500 ₽ / session
You do not need to diagnose yourself or choose a method in advance. You can write me one sentence. Therapy is available in Russian or English; payment is possible in ₽, €, $, ₺. Your time zone does not matter: there are slots on weekdays and weekends, in the morning, afternoon, evening, and even at night. And if even starting a chat feels like one threshold too many right now, leave your details and I will make the first move.
Leave your name, contact details, one or two sentences about what brings you, and a few times that work for you. I will contact you myself — no need to start a Telegram conversation.
You do not need to tell your life story here. One or two sentences are enough. Diagnoses, documents, intimate details, and anything you do not want to leave in a form are better kept for the session itself.